Random thought

It recently occurred to me that the bums in this town are just like the program guys at a sporting event. If you go to enough games at the same stadium, you'll notice that the same program guy is in the same spot for every game, just like the bums in downtown Chicago. My favorite guy when I worked at the United Center was always located just inside gate 3 for Bulls games. My favorite bum? Madison Street sitting underneath the scaffolding on the south side in between La Salle and Clark Streets.

You see, not only are they always in the same place every damn day, but just like program guys they have their own signature catch phrases. My UC guy always yelled, "PROgrams...MEdia guides...YEAR books!" He always said it with the same cadence and the emphasis on the same syllables. He even did this little thing where he scooped the word "books" upwards as he tailed off. I ran into that guy Halloween weekend at Bernie's in Wrigleyville and had a few beers with him. That's honestly the last thing I remember from that night, but I digress.

Well the bum on Madison always says, "spare some change spare some change spare some change spare some change spare some change." He talks in a very quick tempo and seemingly never takes a breath. Unbelievable. I never give him any money, but he amuses me. Just like the program guy.

I don't think I'll ever get drunk with that bum though. If I do, please impale me with a very dull object.